Do I Really Need Therapy?

One of the most frequent questions I receive is: How do I know I really need therapy?  The answer isn’t always easy - it’s different for every person.  Most of the time, however, if drama has occurred in childhood or there’s been traumatic instances in your life, then therapy can be helpful across the board.  This is especially so if your quality of life has been handicapped in some way, whether that’s by depression, anxiety, or any other of a number of issues.  

I suggest you reflect on why you’re wondering whether you need therapy.  Are you experiencing mental, physical, or medical symptoms that affect your daily life - symptoms like anxiety, depression, or chronic pain?  Another thing to question is, what fears have kept you from pursuing therapy?  

Often, people think therapy is what they’ve seen on TV shows or they’ve heard news that someone had a bad experience.  In the current therapy I do, it’s very important to me to make it so you’re comfortable.  I like to get to know someone before therapy so that we can go forward understanding what’s important to them.  I call it “client-centered” therapy where it’s what’s important to that person and the area in their life that they need help with.  Sometimes I’ll weigh in on what I observe in other areas of their life, but I will always consider most important the issue that the person is seeking help for.  

Another of the common questions I field from people are “How long do I need to be at therapy?”  My answer is always that I can’t tell you right away.  Once I do an assessment, I can usually give you a really good idea as to whether it’ll be three months, six months, a year - depending again on the level of trauma and the level that whatever’s going on is infringing your quality-of-life.  

I do also have people that really look at therapy as a continual growth process for them.  Those people may stay in therapy a lot longer because they feel that they are learning to better themselves.  

I also have crisis therapy, which means that someone went through a crisis and they’re having trouble coping.  Often this can be short-term therapy when prior to the crisis the person's functioning was very high.  As implied by the name, then, crisis therapy can involve a very quick recovery time-frame because it’s really just helping someone from a situational trauma get back to where they were prior to whatever episode caused them to suffer.  

When you first arrive to therapy, it’s only natural that your therapist won’t know that much information about you.  Not only that, but some people have a hard time opening up and freely giving information about themselves to their therapist.  One of the things I do very well and that I’m very invested in is an accurate diagnosis - whether that just means of my client’s situation or if it’s actually determining a mental health diagnosis.  I focus so much of my early attention with clients on figuring out their accurate diagnosis because without a correct diagnosis, I as a therapist can’t give an action for an appropriate treatment plan.  Just as a medical doctor has to correctly identify what bone has been broken or what virus you have before they can prescribe the proper medicine, I have to discover what ails you before I can safely suggest any steps toward remedying it.  

I will try to make new clients comfortable, like I’m getting to know them informally, where I’ll ask questions and get information and fill in important gaps of their lives that I don’t yet know.  This process is usually done during the first session.  The second session of therapy is then where goals will be set for what the person wants to accomplish or achieve, and then sessions after that are working towards reaching the goals the person has set.  

One of the last questions I hear people ask often is “How will therapy benefit me?”  To me, that’s a pretty easy answer.  Therapy benefits people in many ways.  Sometimes it is really just getting support through a hard time.  I’m sometimes the person in need of validation.  Many times I’ll say to people if it’s something you could figure out on your own, you probably wouldn’t have come knocking on my door so let’s figure your something out together.  

One of the things I love most about therapy is getting the chance to watch people grow and learn about themselves.  Watching them realize something for the first time and then learning to apply it to all areas of their life is what I find most rewarding.  

I consider therapy to be a holistic process that includes the importance of mental, intellectual, relational, emotional, physical, spiritual, and practical health.  There will always be things you can do to be healthier.  I think most people would find that therapy is one of those things.